Chasing sunsets or The perfectly imperfect

They met for dinner on a rainy Sunday afternoon. It’s been a day filled with storms and heavy seemingly endless rain. A day she would normally just cuddle up on the couch wrapped in a blanket while enjoying a coffee or tea, reading or writing or simply dozing off for a while.

When their eyes met for the first time she felt an overwhelming sense of familiarity. Like they have lived through similar experiences on the journey of their lives this far. He seemed distant, almost guarded yet with a sincere smile that carried hope but she sensed a mysterious maybe even scary depth underneath the surface. The background blurred in the presence of their encounter that day.

He asked her what she was reading, about her favorite author, if she liked poetry. What she heard was the unspoken question if she was ready to go on a journey, to start their chapter.

She learned about his past, his wishes and regrets, his adventures and moments of happiness and what life had put him through. Moments of despair, darkness, loneliness, even feeling helpless at times. She felt touched and shaken to her very core, feeling a deep sense of connection and recognizing her very own pain. “This is what I saw in his eyes. These are the scars I’ve felt in that very first moment our eyes met.”, she thought. “ That’s how our souls already know each other without having ever crossed path before.”

She was too moved to being able to speak, not brave or courageous enough to admit the reason for her silent compassion being her own scars and experiences. Instead she showed her empathy with a gentle touch and embrace, convinced she would have an unlimited amount of time to find her strength to open up, exposing the deepest corners of her being and her vulnerabilities.

Over time they kept walking side by side, adjusting to one another’s pace at times with care and attention, experiencing moments of a sheer magical connection often followed by the rise of invisible but very firm walls between them hiding under playful laughter.

On mornings when she was about to leave her house she took a look at the plants in her garden now that the winter was about to release his grip on nature and the spring had sent its first greetings in the form of warm and gentle rays of sunshine. The plants that had survived the brutal forces of the previous season still looked weak, dry and almost sad.

“I wonder if they are afraid of the inevitable change of the seasons or if they are simply mastering the art of embracing each moment?” she thought while feeling her own anxiety coming up and she sighed.

Over the coming weeks she noticed that the plants started to grow little green leaves. Some more than others or simply at a faster pace. Her favorite plant was the one with such strong and wide roots that parts of them emerged through the surface of the soil. This one also had grown its first leaves yet noticeable less than its companions. “This is us.” She thought to herself while gazing at it with compassion. “The strongest roots in the darkness of the soil yet afraid to grow into the light. If we make it and we should ever blossom, it will be more beautiful than the World can handle I suppose.” she thought when stepping on her bike riding into her daily normalcy.

She had similar thoughts whenever she found herself looking at her favorite plant in her living room. A precious Strelitzia which had grown in density of leaves indicating a firm base while it hadn’t been growing very tall thus far. “With every new leaf there’s hope.”, she felt. “Hope that it will open up by itself and embrace the simplicity and beauty of its existence.”

Most of the times she had to help the leaves to open, leaving them torn, hurting, visibly scared. Looking unconventional to the outside, even ugly some might say. Yet perfectly imperfect with an unseen beauty through her eyes.

“This is us.”, she felt while she was getting ready for a beautiful day at the beach, chasing another sunset, not realizing that winter decided to push his thumb down one last time ready to crush whatever wasn’t strong enough yet to sustain its force.